We don't talk anymore

We exchange lots of words, thoughts and selfies, but we don’t communicate anymore!

Just walk down any street and you’ll pass people with their faces buried into their smartphones.

Just yesterday I saw a family at a restaurant table. All were on their own devices. Is that connecting?

Workers communicate digitally with their fellow colleagues… who are working 10 paces away!

We are social beings, yes! However social media is anything but social.

Talking, touching, connecting with other people is really important. And it goes beyond words.


1.       Number 1: Professor Albert Mehrabian at the Univ of California and Susan Ferris published a study in the Journal of Consulting Psychology that showed that 93% of our communication is non-verbal…

Breaking it down shows that 55% is body language and 38% is tone of voice. Only 7% are the words that we express or type.

This resulted in the professor’s: 7-38-55 Rule of Personal Communication. 

The pitch and tone of your voice, the speed and rhythm of the spoken word, and the pauses between those words may express more than what is being communicated by words alone.

When we coach leaders on executive presence, we teach them to use the power pause to connect.


2.       Number 2: We social animals need Touch & proximity: Many studies show that touch signals safety, trust. It soothes…


3.       Number 3: Social media can promote extreme, inflexible views, especially where people can hide their identities behind their words. Anyone who disagrees with them can expect to be hit by the weight of the mob, silencing their opponents.

This is not communication. This is not connecting. This is forcing our view on others.

However, many solutions to problems can be found somewhere in the middle. Therefore, we need to be open to other people’ POV, even if, especially when its different than ours.

As a leader, we need to listen, be open and truly consider other points of view.

So, get off your chair…walk to colleagues, family members and friends & just talk.


Take action, make a difference!